Leaf-on-the-Wind I

After the fox-spirit called Joyous-Company had been banished from Tengir's lands by a divine boundary, she traveled across mountains and deserts until she reached the land of her birth, where a great multitude of tribes of fox-spirits lived. But shortly after moving back into the household of her parents' clan, she discovered that she was with child. When her father asked her whose child it was, she explained the whole story to him, that it was not possible to know which of the Twins is the child's father. The seasons turned twice, after which the child--a boy--was born, and when he was born all the fox-spirits laughed and said that he ought to be called Leaf-on-the-Wind. Joyous-Company became very sick and died shortly after that. With no one to raise him, he was adopted by his mother's parents, but because he was half-alien and of half-unknown parentage, they did not treat him the same as their other children. They made him sleep outside and eat scraps, and all the work they hated to do the most they forced him to do. When he grew to the age where one begins to understand things, he asked everyone he knew who his father was, but everyone only laughed and told him that it was impossible to know.

But he also heard that there was a famous Oracle located at a certain misty mountain, that the immortal shamaness there was extremely wise, able to answer any question put to her. He learned from some kind people where the mountain was located, but he was also warned by them that the mountain's mist was a god that would reveal the location of the shamaness's cave or not depending on whether Heaven had anything to reveal to the seeker. Those who were elect the mist would lead straight to the cave, but those to whom Heaven had nothing to reveal would easily get lost and may end up dying. Leaf-on-the-Wind accepted the risk and stole away from home one day. Just as he had been told, the mountain was incredibly misty, so much so that he could see no farther than a few feet in front of him. But as he went deeper into the mountain, the mist seemed to be guiding him on a certain course, and before he knew it he was standing at the mouth of a big cave.

From inside the cave, the shamaness of the Oracle said: "You have found me with Heaven's permission. Do not be afraid to come in." And Leaf-on-the-Wind went into the cave to find the elderly shamaness sitting amid several types of divination instruments. She asked him: "What knowledge do ye seek?" Leaf-on-the-Wind replied: "I want to know who my father truly is, that I may know who I truly am." The shamaness said: "Who your father is, who you are, that is Fate." To which Leaf-on-the-Wind: "You are saying Fate is my father? I am not satisfied with an answer like that." And she: "Then let me continue: you are asking me the wrong question. If you only know what your Fate is, then it does not matter who your father is. For most people can rest in the knowledge of who their parents are, etc. and are pushed by Fate sometimes, and pulled by Fate other times. But you float on the wind, and Fate only pulls you." "Then I should like to kill my Fate and so free myself." "You would do so at your own peril, for once you kill your Fate--that is it, you will not get another one. And what is a man without a Fate? He is no longer himself, he has sold his personhood and entered a state worse than death. You cannot trade in your Fate, there are certain rivers that cannot be crossed. Because of that, all living is merely an attempt. You are here because your grandfather attempted, and then after he attempted, your father attempted. Now it is your turn to attempt." "How do I attempt?" "The same way your grandfather and father attempted. Wherever you go, it is the same two legs that bear you there. Let Fate pull you." "But whither does Fate pull me?" "What need is there for me to answer that question? Why do you ask Heaven to reveal that to you when you can go outside and find out for yourself?" Unsatisfied by the shamaness's responses, Leaf-on-the-Wind left the cave and was about to return home, but the words he had just heard continued to weigh on him, and no matter what, he could not go forward as he wished to. He turned around and went in the opposite direction of his home, and swore to his heart that he would never go back there.

He wandered solo through the wilderness for several weeks. Although he was only a boy at the time, his body was very sturdy and he did not catch cold easily, and happily he was not attacked by any robbers or highwaymen because whenever they saw him they felt pity for him and figured he had nothing on him worth stealing anyway. And because he was bright he stayed away from the haunts of monsters and beasts and so came to no harm. However one day he found that a wide river blocked the path he wanted to take. When he got closer to its banks, he saw that it was deep and flowing violently. He thought about turning around and going another way, but he had already set his heart on going that way, so he attempted to cross the river anyway. He got about halfway across before the surging current was too much for him to handle, and he went under. A few men on a boat that was passing by happened to see him struggling and one of them dived in to save him. The man pulled him onto the boat. He had been underwater for a long time and almost drowned, but he did not drown, though he was unconscious. When he came to a couple hours later, he thanked the men and swore he would never forget their kindness. The man who had saved him, called Tall-Virtue, asked him thus: "You are just a boy. Where did you get the idea that you could cross a river like this? Anyway, who are your parents?" Leaf-on-the-Wind answered thus: "My mother was a fox-spirit, but she died while giving birth to me; as for my father, all I know is that he is a son of Lord Tengir. I have never known either of my parents and never will." He went on to tell of his life of suffering among his mother's relatives and of how he finally escaped them. Tall-Virtue was deeply moved by the story and reflected at length. Considering how Heaven had not allotted him and his wife any children of their own, he decided to adopt Leaf-on-the-Wind and give him a proper rearing.

So it was that Leaf-on-the-Wind went to live with Tall-Virtue and his wife, who reared him until he was a man. Since Tall-Virtue was a mariner by trade--one who delivered goods and people up and down the river--he took Leaf-on-the-Wind under his wing and taught him everything he knew about ships and how to pilot them. Being as he was very bright, Leaf-on-the-Wind learned the skills with as much ease as a fish learns to swim, and in the blink of an eye he was already piloting his own ship and making a happy living. But his heart and mind remained young, and the strange facts of his Fate up to that time always weighed on his spirit, skewing his view of the world.

One day as he was taking his boat down the river to deliver goods, he stood at the bow and saw that the spring sky was littered with blossoms. The sight moved his heart, and he declaimed:

"Knowing not what tree I'm fallen of,
I only float on the wind."

He intended to make it a quatrain, but a spell of melancholy enveloped him as he spoke the last word, and the rest of the verse did not come to him. Only a sigh escaped his lips. A few breaths later, he heard a voice call out from some invisible location: "Young man, won't you complete your song?" He laughed and answered thus: "Can't you tell the song is about myself? I am not complete, so how can the song be?" "Have yet ye sought what will complete you?" "How can I seek what I don't know exists?" "If it calls to you, it must exist." He narrowed his eyes and anchored the boat at a spot on the shore that sounded near to the source of the voice. The land adjacent to the shore was thickly forested, so he began checking behind the leaves, where he quickly discovered a girl that could not have been any older than he was. To her he said thus: "Maiden, why are you hiding behind these leaves and taunting me?" She did not say anything in reply, but only smiled at him. It turns out her name was Astral-Flower, and she was comely and fresh of appearance and gentle of heart. Later on she became the wife of Leaf-on-the-Wind.